The fashionable hot topic these days is SLEEP – do you get enough, do you get any, do you reach REM (seriously?), is it interrupted sleep and now there are even apps to tell us if we are breathing properly when we sleep (seriously again!) So much pressure!
We have been given a minimum sleep requirement, suggested hours to accomplish that (and it doesn’t seem to be the 8 hours in between 4am and 12 noon) and a need to know the definition of REM (and then of course the skill to achieve it). We should no doubt be sleeping with a taser in case someone tries to interrupt us, or a diaper in case we have to pee, and now we have to figure out where to clip on a Fitbit so Big Brother can monitor us 24/7 (keep up girlfriend – not talking about the TV show here).
Damn, I am already stressed before I even reach for my nightcap – let’s make it a double!
AND NOW…OMG… now we have the pressure of sleeping with Tom Brady! So that no doubt requires lopping off pounds, visits to stretching racks to reach 5’11’, jumping into the Back To The Future time machine to reverse the 50 years of aging, and that is not the least of it.
It’s not enough that we drink soy in our coffees instead of 3 pumps of that white Dunkin Donuts crap, we spend one to two hours a day exercising, we wear shapers, spandex jeans, push up bras and high heel shoes, spend our IRA money at the hairdresser and makeup counter and have stopped eating the blonde brownies at midnight. And now they want us to ‘work’ at it while we sleep. That’s just plain bullshit.
They call this bullshit ‘The Athlete Recovery Sleepwear’. Come on people, we are all athletes in our own mind. What, no Gold Medal, no worries, they will still sell you a pair of these jammies that contain – as quoted by Dugan Arnett in the Boston Globe, (quoting an Under Armor press release), “Special bioceramic particles that absorb infrared wavelengths emitted by the body that reflect back radiation, a process the company promises will, among other things, reduce inflammation and regulate cell metabolism.” Phew – what a mouthful of (can I say, crap). Oh okay, probably not crap to the so-called real athletes who make 1 million a game, have trainers, masseuses, nutritionists, PT therapists and no doubt the best mattress money can buy! How can they not sleep well already?
For an inside humorous look at the results of donning these PJ’s, hop on over to Dugan’s article when you finish here.
For the inside scoop from those of us BA50’s, I already think you have some thoughts of your own so please let’s get the conversation started below – try to keep in on the PJ’s and keep ‘Deflategate’ out of it because no doubt if you are not from New England, we already know your thoughts on that! And BTW, you would be behind-the-bench on that as Tom loves to laugh at himself and has already done that in this online “Funny or Die” video – worth a lookie from the comfort of your bed while donning that 20-year-old Minnie Mouse T-shirt!
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