Each and every decade brings us renewed wisdom, an enhanced skill set, and a piece of the unknown. Being a 50-something woman and a transformational life coach has peppered my mid-point with an infusion of confidence and a bit of reflection worth sharing.
Your answers to these questions will arm you with new perspectives, which will provide a working foundation for renewing and reinventing your life!
A few years back when I was pivoting toward my own reinvention, I asked myself the first question below. It provided me with a standout defining moment that connected me back to my own truth and ultimately to myself. Perhaps it will do the same for you.
1. If it were 10 years ago, what would you do?
The key to answering this question lies less in what you would do differently because you are older and smarter now, and more in what you would actually do in your 40’s if you were to give yourself permission to do it! If, like me, you are quick to know the answer to this question, then what elements of that answer can you take action on NOW? It can be the smallest step. Take it. Give yourself permission.
2. What can you do now?
This feeds off of the first question! I know that for many years I would set lofty goals for myself and then somewhere on my way to achieving them I got lost on the road to the goal itself. Would I get there? Did I even want to? How would I do this or that? Instead of celebrating the successes, I got caught up in the details and overthought so much. So, if you have 20 minutes, what can you do? If you can accomplish only one thing that is meaningful today, what can you do? There is always something you CAN do and being mindful of this throughout the day is a catalyst to staying grounded and in the moment. The result? You actually accomplish more with better energy and heightened spirit. Measure the growth to the goals…that is where your sweet spot is!
3. What does the word “and” have to do with anything?
Everything! For years, I worked in Corporate America, until in my mid 30’s I had my first child. I thought I would go back to work, or start my own business, yet one child became two, and then one home became a second home, and then a third home to renovate and decorate. Essentially, one year became many years. It was a lovely life, yet I kept asking myself what was next, what was my next chapter? Even though I heard an inner whisper, the excuses for why I couldn’t begin this next chapter of my life were infused with all the reasons why my family needed me, or that it was not the right time, or my favorite… I don’t have the time. In actuality, what I did not have was the muscle of the word “and.” This one 3-letter word shifts everything, and it is a golden tool you can use when fear and limiting beliefs jump in your way.
Here is an example:
Let’s say you are now an empty nester…kids are out of the house. Yet, you are still going into your corporate job every day despite the fact that you have wanted to start your consulting business for years.
Old thought: I want to start my own consulting business, I have so much experience but I have six more years of college to pay for so it is not the right time.
New thought: I want to start my own consulting business. I have so much experience and knowledge that I can offer to others, and while the kids still have college expenses, I am going to begin part time to build out the foundation of my business through researching, networking, incorporating, and taking on my first clients.
Powerful! See the shift?
4. What are you good at? What do you want to be good at?
The magic in this double question is that what you excel at and what you would like to acquire skills in changes many times throughout your life. The answer to these questions at any given point in time fine-tunes your ability to vision and mindfully manifest what you most want. Why is that important? Legacy! You have the choice and the power to carve out and LIVE the legacy you most want. The best part is, you can start from any point in time. Your legacy is ongoing and subject to your own approval! This actionable list highlighting your strengths and where you would like to learn more, opens the door to welcoming self-awareness and growth into your life.
5. How can I honor my struggles?
Even the best-lived life has adversity. Illness, death, job loss, divorce, and disappointment all impact us. When you take ownership of the less glamorous moments, you appreciate the spectacular ones. My parent’s divorce happened when I was 17. I thought I had dealt with my feelings about that, yet when both my parents passed, my grieving took a turn down memory lane. I knew that I needed to reprocess that period in time so that I could fully forgive, and understand, and come full circle with the impact that their decisions had on our family. I needed to honor that this “broken home” was part of what makes me “me.” It’s the grit that defines me, and it is also the messiness that provides me with some of the very best resiliency, strategic life tools, and strategies to be authentically me! Honoring my struggles helps me to highlight my successes!
Read more from Randi here: randilevincoaching.com