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This morning I was so hungry I ate 2 breakfasts. I’m not sure why I’m so hungry. I thought the poached egg (yes I’m back on eggs), and the Ezekiel Sprouted Grain Bread with half an avocado and 2 cherry tomatoes would be enough. I drank a second cup of coffee and my tummy was still grumbling. “Ah Come On!” I chastised myself, but to no avail. Out came the Greek Total Yogurt with a smattering of Granola. “Ah, Perfect.”

But, MY appetite is not what I’m worried about, it’s our refrigerator’s. Yes indeed, it turns out our fridge is hungry and it keeps devouring food and we have to keep filling it and frankly it’s not an easy task.

I feel like Seymour in Little Shop of Horrors. There is this insane “being” living in our kitchen and when we open the door it screams, “FEED ME!”

And when it starts screaming to be fed my husband and I go into a huddle and begin to scheme about what is the best way to feed HIM so we don’t have to keep running out to do it again because it’s getting dangerous!

Our refrigerator has become Audrey II, the insatiable Plant in Little Shop of Horrors. It’s Monstrous! “FEED ME” it keeps screaming.

But feeding our refrigerators is risky business for all of us. It now requires that we suit up and brave the outside world which is swimming in a toxic invisible virus that we have thus far avoided by what we are certain is pure luck at this point.

Why can’t our refrigerator be like a vending machine. If it were, I would fill it with dark chocolate and Pellegrino, oranges and blueberries and total greek yogurt and 2 real chickens who would lay a fresh egg every day. Even better, imagine if we could just ask and voila, just like in this viral kids video about a naughty fridge who provides (reluctantly) whatever is asked of it….(over 120 million views)

It wasn’t so long ago that grocery shopping was fun. We loved our local farmer’s market, visiting with neighbors and catching up with the Olive Lady, the Granola Man, and the Special Cheese People. Food shopping was something we loved doing together. No more! I am now the designated masked shopper and it’s a lonely task full of anxiety and confusion.

But of course, complaining about filling our mouths is indeed ridiculous in light of what we witness on TV everyday. We are awed by the world of health care workers who risk their lives for us as curves rise and flatten, hope glimmers, parents become teachers as we become students of a world we understand less and less.

So forgive me Audrey II for any anxiety we feel trying to fill your shelves and keep you satisfied and hopefully we can make peace somewhere between the fruit bin and the cheese drawer because truly you are merely a little bonzai in the overgrown world of untamed flora that has yet to be fully understood.

Little Shop Of Horrors: Who Invited Audrey II Into Our Kitchen? was last modified: by

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