Reasons I May Be Up Right Now (When I Should Be Sleeping)*:
I’m dehydrated
I’m over-hydrated
I have to pee
I didn’t eat dinner
I had too much dinner
I can’t remember if I took my pills
Cancer
I have to pee
I’m in the middle of a great book
I just started a new book
I’m at the end of a lousy book
I’m writing this blog
I have no idea what I’ll be writing about this week
I’m emailing New York Times stories to my friends and kids
I’m contemplating whether my kids have read any New York Times story I have ever emailed them
I have to pee
I’m texting my sister in law
My phone emits dangerous light
I’m catching up on the news (on my phone)
The news has made me anxious
I had coffee after 5PM
I had rum after 9PM
I ate too much sugar
I have to pee
My thumbs hurt
My feet hurt
Nothing hurts right now, but I know I’ll be hurting tomorrow
I’m hot
I’m cold
I’m researching the weather
I hear a funny noise
My kid didn’t text me back
My pillow is leaking feathers
There’s a full moon
I have to pee
I have to be up in two hours anyway
I have to be up in five hours, but if I got up now, I’d get alot accomplished
I don’t really need to be up for anything tomorrow
My husband is having a nightmare
My husband is snoring
My husband can’t sleep and I don’t want him to be up alone
I’m almost 60
I’ve gained weight, I just know it
My eyebrows need tweezing
Global warming
Words with Friends
I need to pee
*this piece was inspired by an New York Times article by Julia Shiplett from May 12, 2018 “Reasons I May Be Eating Right Now” which I found hysterical. You can read it here