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Reasons I May Be Up Right Now (When I Should Be Sleeping)*:

I’m dehydrated

I’m over-hydrated

I have to pee

I didn’t eat dinner

I had too much dinner

I can’t remember if I took my pills

Cancer

I have to pee

I’m in the middle of a great book

I just started a new book

I’m at the end of a lousy book

I’m writing this blog

I have no idea what I’ll be writing about this week

I’m emailing New York Times stories to my friends and kids

I’m contemplating whether my kids have read any New York Times story I have ever emailed them

I have to pee

I’m texting my sister in law

My phone emits dangerous light

I’m catching up on the news (on my phone)

The news has made me anxious

I had coffee after 5PM

I had rum after 9PM

I ate too much sugar

I have to pee

My thumbs hurt

My feet hurt

Nothing hurts right now, but I know I’ll be hurting tomorrow

I’m hot

I’m cold

I’m researching the weather

I hear a funny noise

My kid didn’t text me back

My pillow is leaking feathers

There’s a full moon

I have to pee

I have to be up in two hours anyway

I have to be up in five hours, but if I got up now, I’d get alot accomplished

I don’t really need to be up for anything tomorrow

My husband is having a nightmare

My husband is snoring

My husband can’t sleep and I don’t want him to be up alone

I’m almost 60

I’ve gained weight, I just know it

My eyebrows need tweezing

Global warming

Words with Friends

I need to pee

 

*this piece was inspired by an New York Times article by Julia Shiplett from May 12, 2018 “Reasons I May Be Eating Right Now” which I found hysterical. You can read it here

 

 

 

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