Pamela Madsen
Think you might become a Badass Babe at midlife– here’s how it could happen…
1. The Big Bang:
Sometimes, the birth of a Badass Babe begins in a great big shake up! There she is minding her own business, living her everyday normal life when it happens. She may let go of a marriage, her lover may dump her, she might get fired or get bored to a state of unbearable numbness. The big bang could even be something like an accident or the death of loved one or illness. Maybe she even loses her home or all her money. She may decide that she cannot live where she is living for one minute longer. Sometimes, the wake up call may be softer in appearance; more like a whisper. No one but yourself may know…but nothing will ever be the same again. Shit happens. And it seems that more of it happens at mid life than at any other time.
2. The Retreat:
She gets thrown out of the saddle, absolutely rocked out of her everyday pattern, and she decides to open her own voice and pay attention to her needs. Dare I say it? She decides to put her own needs first. The first thing many of us do is take time off and retreat. Yes, we go “Under The Tuscan Sun”, or perhaps “Eat, Pray, Love”. Some of us literally need to run and literally retreat somewhere that will help us get back to ourselves. We may start all Deepak Chopra, or in a pretzel yoga back bend, or find ourselves at a sexuality retreat; perhaps all of it. I did. We need to somehow shift our regular way of being, and we want to do it in a big way. Many Badass Babes start with their relationship to their bodies and their sexuality, which makes sense since that is their engine… and if that’s not working well, their creative energy will be stalled.
This is a risk taking time with no guarantees. The only thing she is sure of is that she must do something different. I have seen women quit their jobs, sell their homes, relocate, and climb Mount Fiji. She is ready for the great big life adventure and it does not exist in her comfort zone. There may be only one thing that she are sure of– and that is that she is leaving her old life behind in some way. She will never be the same again.
3. Finding Her Path:
This is the period where she rebirths. She is no longer that woman who pulls up her big white panties. Now she has on her shit-kicker boots! While she has been on retreat, she has been reunited with her body and her soul voice. She has figured out her mission and the next steps for living a great big colorful life. If you are one of these lucky women, you have vision, you have boarded your soul and you are no longer stuck. Some people call it finding your purpose, or knowing your calling. Maybe it’s about living an entirely new existence or changing the world. Maybe both.
4. Badass Babe Boot Camp or Getting it Done!
I love this part. Now that our Badass Babe has figured out what she wants more than anything in the world, it’s time to drive that train and build your team of supporters! Surround yourself with cheer leaders and sit your ass down and clear the work space.
It’s time to write that book, take that training, open that practice, or take that trip around the world. The Babeass Babe now has her mission, and it’s to change the way she has been living and even perhaps impact the world. She may need to raise money; build that new business and create things. Many Badass Babes meet other Badass Babes on their retreats and start their new path with their sisters. She develops a daily practice of self care, which means not only taking care of the basics, but she has figured out how to give herself pleasure on a regular basis
6. Warning! Screw The U Turn:
Now it’s possible that somewhere since the Big Bang and the retreat our Badass Babe may fall back into her old ways. Let’s face it, radically changing our lives is really hard work even though it is exciting. There could be setbacks. Our Babe Ass Babe may begin to doubt her mission and herself. She may complicate trying to fix that old tired broken relationship or going back to work in a field she was slowly killing her. After all, life was “easier then”.
Fear may creep in. This is the time for some extra self care. Take that second retreat, reach for your friends, grab a coach. This is the time to dig in and not back out. Babe Ass Babes, may need to go shopping, get laid, eat chocolate or take a nap. It’s okay; do it. But no U Turns. Trust yourself. It all has to happen in perfect timing, and sometimes things don’t always work out the way we think they will. You may have to restart or change course. Life doesn’t always go in a straight line. Actually, mostly it doesn’t. But somehow, if you keep yourself committed to your mission – you will get there.
7. The Badass Babe is Born
Just like that tired old metaphor of the caterpillar going into the chrysalis and emerging as that magnificent butterfly – you will. All of that hard work to re-create yourself will pay off. Yes, you will come through fear and find your courage to live the life you know that you can have. Once a Babeass Babe is focused on creating the life she wants to have; she is calling in her vision and things will start to come to life. I call it “calling in grace”.