Felice ShapiroI was contacted by a PR firm to interview a “Loveologist” Wendy Strgar but was skeptical to go ahead with the assignment given the “calling card” of “Loveologist. “ What is that — a sexpert or something — really? I’m ashamed to say however, as a superfan of Jane Fonda, I took the assignment. You see…Wendy’s PR person was pushing her link to the Netflix series Grace & Frankie.
Have you seen Grace & Frankie? It stars Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin. Here’s the premise summarized by Wikipedia:
“The series follows Grace, a retired cosmetics mogul, and Frankie, a hippie art teacher, whose husbands, Robert and Sol, are successful divorce lawyers in San Diego. Grace and Frankie’s lives are turned upside down when Robert and Sol announce that they are in love with each other and are leaving their wives. Now, the women, who have never particularly liked each other, are forced to live together and support each other as they navigate the next chapter of their lives.”
The second season introduced the homemade lubricant developed by Lily Tomlin’s character Frankie. Entire episodes revolve around the packaging, selling and ethical manufacturing of the product. That’s where Wendy came in.
Out of the blue, Wendy received an email from Fonda seeking insights into the organic lube business based on Wendy’s experience in building her company Good Clean Love. Wendy flew from her home in Oregon to Los Angeles and met with Fonda and Tomlin on the set, where she regaled the stars with stories about why she started the company (out of her own need), why organic lubes are important (most lubes have petrochemicals that carry risks of vaginal infection and increased susceptibility to HIV and STD), and the need for frank talk about sex (a Wendy specialty and something the show has in spades).
So Wendy and I had a little chat which turned out to be a really fun interview that I wanted to share with you all.
You see Wendy is totally passionate about helping the world become a more loving place she’s so much more than someone pushing her products. Her philosophy about life and love and relationships are the drivers behind her business. After speaking with her, I was impressed by how aligned her life is with her work.
Wendy’s product, Good Clean Love is the fastest growing organic lubricant in the country (95% organic material made with Aloe Vera).
Wendy understands women over 50 generally have hormonal issues. Most women are either peri or post menopausal and the by-product is dryness.
She says that sadly for many women over 50 — if they haven’t been active sexually it becomes more difficult as they age –(use it or lose it). Although she says the average age of her consumers are between 33 to 65.
Wendy says she started this business to save her own marriage,
“I grew up as a child of divorce. After my 4th kid I was dry all the time and I had severe reactions to products on the market because of petrochemicals.
Keeping my sex life active was very important to me.”
Felice: So my first question — I had to ask — “What is a Loveologist”?
Wendy: “Someone who studies and writes about love. Love is a skill-based activity – not just something you are born with.”
Felice: “What are some of your most popular products?”
Wendy: “Almost Naked Personal Lubricants (it’s on the shelves in most stores). “Restore” and “Balance”
“Rebalance – personal wipes.
However, for most of our customers, the issue is about libido. It’s about waking up your libido so we have scents that help with that. We call them natural aphrodisiacs.
Real perfume is toxic and filled with petrochemicals and we have a small line that is natural.
“Love oils” are essential for waking up your sensuality and key for arousal.
We are all so busy and distracted that we don’t build a scent bridge to our partner which is the key way to jump start desire.
For many years Masters and Johnson confused us about what wakes up first. The truth is, it’s about waking up the libido — arousal will come along and desire will follow.
So if a woman would just try to find a place to connect to feel physical with her partner the rest will follow.
If you have really good sex with someone – it cuts away all the noise and you can communicate better after.
I’ve been married for 33 years. We are now dealing with the empty nest. Marriage is not about luck – it’s all about determination to do this hard work.
When the kids left there was no longer as much distraction. Now with just the 2 of us, we’ve had to make choices of how we are going to be together again.
We’ve all been around long enough to know that falling in love lasts for about 6 months – the real work comes after – this is when we have to deal with the relationship.
Loving people is the hardest work we do because people are annoying and we are impatient.
Even with the people we are most intimate with – our relationships keep changing and we don’t deal with change.
At the end of our lives the only thing that matters is who we loved and who loves us back.”
(I got to agree)