Truth be told, divorce is perceived as one of the most traumatic life experiences, and there are also breakups which can be extremely tough as well. Depression, insecurity, losing your partner, and thinking about your kids and their future can sometimes result in other serious problems, such as eating disorders and substance use disorders. However, these aren’t as common as the general feeling of guilt a lot of people are dealing with after a divorce or breakup. If you want to learn how to overcome that feeling and take your life in your own hands, just keep on reading. Here are four useful tips on how to make it happen, so check them out.
Always keep your friends close
Keeping your friends close no matter what is one of the most important things you should do when dealing with an unsuccessful relationship or marriage, but you know what? The fact is that a lot of people fail to maintain their friendships during the marriage, and that’s probably because they’re fully devoted to their partners. Spending almost all of your time with your partner obviously leaves you no time for anyone else, right? Well, it doesn’t have to be like that at all, as speaking to your friends and staying in close touch with them is crucial for your well-being. Yes, we understand that you’re afraid that your friends will be judgmental or unsupportive of your decisions, but trust us when we say that keeping everything to yourself is the last thing you want to do. So, be open and honest with your friends and you can be sure that they’ll besuper supportive and not judgmental at all. That’s what friends are for, right?
Protect yourself in the first place
If you’ve ever been on a plane, you’ve heard the instructions from the flight attendant that you should secure your own air mask before you assist anyone else in the event of an emergency. Well, the same thing applies to a marriage or a relationship, which means that you’re the one who’s responsible for your emotions – including your happiness. Even though there will be a lot of bad emotions you’ll be dealing with, such as sadness, anger, fear, and helplessness, it’s completely normal to still have feelings of love and care for your partner. However, you should still work on maintaining your happiness before trying to make sure that your ex is doing well, too. Your main job is to deal with your own insecurities, work on them, and protect yourself, because no one else will do that for you. And no, you won’t seem selfish if you put your own needs first, so don’t worry and stop feeling guilty about that.
Remember that making changes can bring you good
Everyone knows that making big changes can be a quite intimidating experience – especially when you’re a freshly divorced lady in her fifties. However, we have to say that it can also be a life-changing experience, depending on from which perspective you’re looking at it. For example, changing your career is always a good idea, and it’s particularly true if you’re unhappy with your current job and you desperately want to change it. This can be a great start that can significantly improve the quality of your life and your overall well-being, so don’t wait any longer and do something good for yourself after a divorce. For example, if you’re an employed Australian lady who wants to step up her business game and get promoted to management level, you should definitely check out business courses in Sydney. If that’s what you’re looking for, don’t wait any longer and make necessary changes that will help you get through the tough times and live your best life.
Overthinking is the enemy of the process of healing
When a relationship/marriage ends, people tend to spend countless hours overthinking every little detail and situation attempting to discover what went wrong. If that’s the case with you, too, remember thatoverthinking is one of your biggest enemies in the process of healing. Yes, your mind will act as a detective, wanting to find clues and revisiting different scenes – both real and hypothetical ones – that can help you figure out what caused your relationship to end. Besides that, you’re also highly likely to relentlessly analyze your feelings about your ex, the person who’s no longer a part of your life, which can definitely bring you more harm than good in the long run. Of course, the hours you’ll spend re-examining the past is a part of the healing process, but overdoing it can prevent you from living in the present moment and moving towards the future. So, instead of spending numerous hours trying to understand why a relationship ended, spend that time figuring out who you are without that person in your life. That’s the safest way towards healing.
As you can see, there are a lot of amazing ways to deal with guilt after an unsuccessful marriage or relationship, and these four have found their place on our list for a good reason. So, if you’re freshly divorced or out of a long relationship, just make sure to stick to our tips and guidelines and you’ll do a great job. That’s a promise!