With Myself

Confessions of a People-Pleasing Addict From Trauma Therapist Rythea Lee

Giving up the addiction of people-pleasing creates a crisis. Severe childhood trauma cannot be stuffed forever, can it? Not in my case.My entire sense of self is undergoing a massive renovation and the new look is ugly. My Father was so violent, my Mother so absent, that I was born a workaholic. Watch, listen, and learn; that took every bit of my brain power. I did not let down. Did not rest. Did not “get to know myself.” I got to know them endlessly, and that was my very best strategy. It wasn’t just about observation; it was also about fixing the problem. ...
Antique clock

What’s Really Important is Time After 50!

I went in to buy a vacuum years ago and listened as the salesman tried to close a deal, assuring a woman my age that the appliance had a twenty-year guarantee. “I don’t care about that,” she answered. I felt sad for her. Last weekend the scene repeated itself verbatim when I went to purchase a new mattress. After a split second of recognizing “yep, that’s me now,” I flipped the message and bought the most luxurious mattress I’ve ever owned....
Felice Shapiro

I Glanced At My Reflection and Paused…Am I Ready For This?

My suitcases lay empty and open, waiting for content. I was reluctant. After 3 months of hunkering down in the mountains of Park City, our rental was up. I had left myself 3 days to pack up. But each day I found a reason to bypass the empty suitcases and take another walk, read my book, and write a bit more. Anything but fill that nylon zippered void.......
Shirley Valentine DVD Cover

A Role Model For Fearless Women… Shirley Valentine Lives On

I first met Shirley Valentine almost 20 years ago. The chatty, quirky, homely heroine in the movie by the same name, she was skillfully portrayed by British actress Pauline Collins. Shirley was a bored, middle-aged housewife who felt life was passing her by. Trapped in a bad marriage and going through the motions, she spent most of her time alone, at home, talking to the wall. Then came act two. And that’s when things got interesting. The drab mother of two grown children ran away from home....

The Curious Life Choices of an Introverted Control Freak

I joke that I like to “plan my spontaneity,” but most who know me well, know I am not really joking. Over the years, friends and colleagues have encouraged me to drop my guard, to be less “bossy” and to compromise more. Let someone else plan something for a change, they’d say. What they didn’t understand is that my desire to control my universe is deep-rooted. It started with a revelation when I was about eight years old....
Skiing and listening to music

Throwback Music That Fills The Soul : What’s On Your Spotify Playlist?

My Harman Kardon stereo was my bed mate in high school. America's Horse with No Name, The Doors Rider's On The Storm, and Steve Miller's Joker and Toker and Midnight Smoker tucked me into my dreams each night. I can't remember it all but Bruce Springsteen carried me through my first romance and although I gave up the boyfriend, I never gave up Bruce....
Books on a table on a ship

My Solo Fling with a Mediterranean Playboy

It was a blustery August day in Marseille. The view overlooking the Mediterranean was dramatic. The waves crashed against the rocks, mere feet below my table. I chose Restaurant Peron because it was extensively featured in famed author Peter Mayle’s Caper series. The four books ran the gamut from vintage wine theft and unsolvable diamond heists to the influx of Russians along the French Riviera, and a real estate deal gone bad....

Sitting On The Edge Trying My Best

I find myself sighing a lot lately. Big heavy sighs that can’t seem to expunge the helplessness and hopelessness that seem to envelope me more than any other time in my life. I love Autumn. I love the cooler days and nights. I even love the change of time and the early darkness. But everything is so different this year that the things I’ve always embraced I find myself dreading....