Healthy Mind

Interview

What Women In Their 50’s and 60’s Are Worrying About

Attention Better After 50 women -- are you a worrier? Do you or a loved one you know suffer with anxiety? Well you are not alone. Women in their 50's and 60's are worrying. That's a fact. And, according to Lynn Lyons, it's normal. But the way we worry, ruminate, our patterns of how we deal with our anxiety, has been embedded over the years. In her new book The Anxiety Audit, Lynn talks about identifying our patterns and how to shift them. Lynn's book is incredibly helpful for those of us who are worriers. Women over 50 know their roles are changing and we need to pivot. The tools we used as the key player in our families requires new strategies. Lynn's techniques for dealing with anxiety and worry and RPN, repetitive negative thinking, are simple to understand and incredibly helpful. Please listen in to my interview with Lynn and share with those you love and hopefully this will be helpful to you. Felice Shapiro In Conversation With Author Lynn Lyons...

Positive Steps: Getting Into the Growth Zone

“The comfort zone is a behavioral state within which a person operates in an anxiety-neutral condition, using a limited set of behaviors to deliver a steady level of performance, usually without a sense of risk.” There is a great piece in positive psychology about getting out of the comfort zone and into the growth zone and how to do it. "The core idea is that our nervous systems have a Goldilocks zone of arousal. Too little, and you remain in the comfort zone, where boredom sets in. But too much, and you enter the ‘panic’ zone, which also stalls progress."...

A Love/Hate Relationship with My Breasts

“After 50 years old, you should never have sex on top,” my girlfriend quoted her mother. “Why not?” I cried out. “I love it on top!” “I know, but Mom preached, ‘You don’t want your big old breasts hanging in his face,’” she said wagging her scolding finger. I hadn’t really visualized what my “girls” might look like from HIS perspective. It occurred to me that if I hovered over his face low enough, I could probably smother him to death with my bottom-heavy, pendulous pillows. Always looking for a solution to continue to do what feels good, I asked, “What if I wore a pretty bra?”...
Ronna Benjamin

Body Image Acceptance: Boobs, Cancer, and 10 pounds

It has been over five years now since the end of treatment, and the whole experience seems like a nightmare that happened to someone else. I have truly put it in a box in my mind that opens shortly before my annual mammogram, and then closes again. Since that time, my husband and I moved onto our sailboat and lived a life full of adventure. I have short silver hair that I love. And when I look in the mirror, I am still just fine with my boobs. It is still that extra 10-15 pounds on my ass and hips that I hate....

On Writing: How We Jump Started Our Creative Juices

Covid fatigue is a bear. Despite the camaraderie of our writing group we were running flat after 2 years of weekly 2 hour sessions. "How do we get re-inspired  and re-motivated," was the burning question.  And, as the group's leader, I was charged with the personal challenge to find a way to wake us all up. So this Tuesday's writing group meeting started with a cry for help.  "Hey guys, is anyone having a hard time focusing lately?"  They all nodded in agreement. "Ok, ok," I was starting to feel my pulse again,  "Me too. So let's try this...( I was grasping at anything at this point).......
Graceful woman dancer dancing on the beach

My Oprah Winfrey Moment…Why 52 doesn’t have to be 30

That was precisely when it happened, my authentic Oprah Winfrey a-ha moment. At 52, I wanted out of our poisonous, youth-obsessed beauty culture, illusionary at best but more often unapologetically deceptive. Images offered as “effortless” in magazines and social media seductively and insidiously pulverize female self-esteem to a microfine powder which fails its promise to illuminate. I wanted my money back. I credit my savvy and self-confident teenage daughter Kate for rousing me from idiocy. It was a Sunday morning, and with a keen eye, I scrutinized online offerings...
couple hugging

Why We Need a Hug Now!

In these disorienting times I feel like I’m holding all this emotion in my body with nowhere to put it. There was actually a study where healthy adults were monitored for how often they hugged. Then they were quarantined and intentionally infected with a cold virus. Those who received more hugs had less severe disease. Counterintuitive, no? That those who receive more hugs are somehow more protected from infection? Maybe if CVS dispensed comforting hugs.......
Tony Robbins

Darwinism, Tony Robbins and Surviving “The Winter of Our Discontent”

There is something truly scientific going on here as we move into our 3rd winter of discontent. There's something that the historians and scientists will have a go at in a few years, but as of now we have to muck through the reality of this winter.  Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful. My gratitude list is huge but we humans are not meant to live like this. What is the Darwinian side of isolation? Who wins? Maybe only Tony Robbins' disciples win. ...
Thanksgiving dinner

This Thanksgiving Is Different!

Thanksgiving will be like no other because of last Thanksgiving. This year many of us dare to gather but we cannot forget what we lived through just one Thanksgiving ago. And that remembrance makes this Thanksgiving all the more special. Most of us are going to gather despite the rising rates of Covid, because it's time for us to be together again. We are ready to celebrate and be hopeful. The simple act of gathering has taken on new meaning. The gathering is the grand prize of this Thanksgiving....
Felice Shapiro

Avoiding Transition

"When are we leaving? It's already mid-October and we are the only ones on our street who are still here." My husband has been ready move on from our island home of almost 6 months and back on the mainland of life. "Wow, really, you're ready? I have so many writing projects. I'm starting my Podcast. I will get distracted by life if I leave here. It's so cozy and quiet here. I can think here. All the tourists have left. I love it." "You mean you just want to stay for another month or two?" "That would be awesome." What a gem of a guy I think. "Nope, that's not gonna happen." "Holy, shit he's really ready."...

When I Can’t Sleep: Hurricane Henri & Late Night Thrillers

"Hurricane Henri is predicted to arrive early Sunday," I said to my kids. Be careful Mom they chimed in from the other coast. I'm so excited. I don't care if Henri isn't well behaved. He's invited, and we will be ready. "I can't wait, I wish you were here. ("OMG, I'm so annoying, I have to stop saying I wish you were here -- but I laugh to myself, since they can't come at least Henri is coming") Guest Henri requires some prep. We prefer a short stay but hope he's not too irritable. I fill the car with groceries, batteries, grab the last flash light from the drugstore and wonder about that bad decision to NOT spring for the generator....