Ginny Poleman

Words of wisdom

Not So Wise Words of Wisdom

I’m sending out a blanket apology to anyone who listened to my advice when I was twenty-five. I’m so sorry, I was an idiot. My friend Sonia recently reminded me that she got married because of me. I had no recollection of any profound words. We thought, how many bad marriages could have been avoided if people didn’t listen to our shitty WISDOM? ...

When My Body Becomes This Old House

My gynecologist stood up from between the stirrups, peeled off her surgical gloves with a snap, and said, “you have a loss of vulvar architecture.” “Pardon me?” “Post-menopausal women commonly lose physical definition of the vulva,” she said. Is this something ELSE I need to maintain? I can’t exercise my vulva like I do my ass to keep it lifted off the back of my thighs. Can I? Thankfully I can’t see my vulva in the 10X magnification mirror—...
Kiss and lipstick

When a Kiss is Easier than Saying ‘No Thank You.’

When I left the coffee shop with Jonathan, I had reached that moment on the date when I had to make a decision: how would I graciously end this? We had matched on Bumble. We’d both attended Cornell and knew some of the same people. Before we met, we had a hilarious phone conversation. I had looked forward to the date, but when we met, he wasn’t exactly what I expected. He was overwhelmingly big in personality
and underwhelming in stature....
Carrie Bradshaw

Some Things I Never Do When Dating After 50

I walked into the swanky hotel lobby bar dressed in black jeans, black shear blouse, black boots, and my favorite red shearling coat, furry side out. It was a ‘look at me’ outfit. I felt like Carrie Bradshaw. “Where do you live?” I asked, covering the ubiquitous ‘get-to-know-you’ questions. “Chelsea, but you’ll never see the inside of my place,” he gibed....
Ginny Poleman

Post Divorce: Feeling like 18 Again

Last Saturday with no plans, I reserved a timed entry for one person to the Whitney Museum of Art and headed downtown. I plugged my earbuds in listening to the museum’s audio guide, and took my time revisiting my favorites and appreciating some new works of art. No one interrupted, distracted, or expected anything of me. My skin tingled with inspiration, as my heart rate slowed. My feet floated through the galleries, while my spirit was grounded....

The Holidays and The Beast within Me

Since our separation, my soon-to-be ex-husband of thirty years and I have spent the holidays together with our young adult children. I rationalized that handling a little discomfort for a couple of days of celebrating together was far better than the heartache of feeling left out. Normally, it’s been fine for a day or two with all the extended family around, but this Christmas, due to Covid, there would be no big gatherings, just the five of us—me, my ex, my daughter, my son and his wife. And this year, it wasn’t just two days, unexpectedly it turned into ten....
Dancing at a wedding

ï»żOne Marriage Begins as One Marriage Ends

My twenty-four year-old son stood in front of me and said, “I’m going to propose to Sara.” Of course I was excited for him. I loved Sara and they loved each other. But in my head I yelled, “nooooooo. I’m not ready!” I was okay with my son getting married, but I wasn’t ready to witness the beginning of his marriage so close to the end of my own. It was just six weeks earlier that his dad and I had agreed to divorce....
Couple in love drinking tea and enjoying winter holidays

Young Love: My Daughter and Her Boyfriend

I tried to keep my eyes on the puzzle but I couldn’t help observing my daughter—now a young woman—gaze at her lover. People say she looks like me with her turned up nose and heart-shaped face, but her coloring is all her dad’s side of the family: deep, deep auburn hair; creamy porcelain skin with a smattering of peachy freckles; and light colored eyes—one blue, one light brown. The soft light of the fire danced across her face, illuminating her happiness....
Ginny Poleman

Ginny Poleman

Ginny Poleman spends her time giving in-person walking tours and webinars about NYC history; leads school tours at the Metropolitan Museum Art; and goes on cool dates in cozy lounges and retro bars. She also works on her young adult novels. Follow her adventures on Instagram @ginnyinprogress, and her tour business @NYC.Encounters.