“What are you going to be for Halloween?”
“A grandmother,” I replied.
“Like Estelle on Golden Girls with gray wig and baggy clothes?”
“No. No costume n...
I’ve come to dread summer. Watching everyone else have somewhere to go and someone to do it with gave me major league FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).
So this sum...
I admit, thirty-five years ago, I wasn’t a natural fit into my husband’s family. I never thought of myself as a big personality, but my downstate New Yorker-sel...
I recently discovered a dating coach on social media who put out a challenge — a kind of manifestation. She said, “instead of being discouraged by the stupid shit men do [my words, not verbatim from the dating coach], focus on the behaviors you like, and say to the Universe ‘Yes, please! More of THAT!’” I liked this idea of giving a thumbs-up on what worked instead of kvetching on the negative. Too many times I’ve shaken my head feeling discouraged, frustrated, and sometimes, downright pissy about dating.
For example, texting with obtuse men like Michael on dating apps.
Michael: How’s your day so far babe?
Me: Good! Thanks. Isn’t it a bit premature to use “babe” before we’ve even met? 😉
Michael: Babe, it’s nothing. It’s just a name to show how much I appreciate you.
Well, I hope you appreciate this, Michael: *Unmatch.* Oh Universe? No more pet names, please....
There’s a scene in the Sex in the City reboot, And Just Like That, where Carrie and her new, career-driven, 50+, single friend, Seema talk about dating. Carrie says, “I think it’s great that you’re still putting yourself out there.”
Ugh.
Seema points out the insensitivity by saying, “you found the love of your life and had him for many years. And in my eyes, that is something worth still putting myself out there.”
Like Seema, since my divorce, well-meaning but oblivious married friends and family say things that make me want to say, “f##k off.”...
Fuck Disney. Those old princess movies closing with “and they lived happily ever after” taught us that conquering the witches and scaling castle walls were the ...
So you’re gonna give online dating a go? After five years on and off the dating apps, I’ve learned a thing or two — or five. The first thing to keep in mind is ...
Being single again after a long-term marriage, I have found the dating world is kinda different. The people are the same — men still say they’ll call but don’t....
I grabbed a drink with a former boyfriend, one that I now admit, I was still a bit in love with. Occasionally we’d meet up and sometimes we’d even hook-up. On t...
“After 50 years old, you should never have sex on top,” my girlfriend quoted her mother.
“Why not?” I cried out. “I love it on top!”
“I know, but Mom preached, ‘You don’t want your big old breasts hanging in his face,’” she said wagging her scolding finger.
I hadn’t really visualized what my “girls” might look like from HIS perspective. It occurred to me that if I hovered over his face low enough, I could probably smother him to death with my bottom-heavy, pendulous pillows.
Always looking for a solution to continue to do what feels good, I asked, “What if I wore a pretty bra?”...
I needed a full-length mirror for my bathroom. I was tired of climbing and perching on the edge of my bathtub like an Olympic balance-beam event just to see my ...
‘What’s her story?’ I used to ask myself when spotting a woman seated at the bar by herself.
Now that woman is me.
Over the last five years separated and ...
I liked the idea of moving throughout my day from joy to joy.....Since my divorce, my life is so different from those days when my calendar was full with after-school activities and my husband’s work events. Now, instead of rushing the kids off to school, my mornings are similar to Susan’s with her morning coffee and newspaper, except I wake up looking forward to my favorite smoothie: chocolate flavored protein powder with a banana and sugar-free sunflower butter—a healthy, morning treat that tastes like dessert........
It was July, a month after the big divorce conversation, when I soaked my brother’s shirt with my tears.
“What about the holidays?” I stopped to blow my nose...
Weeks after my husband moved out of the family house, I pumped gas at the gas station while talking to my mother on the phone.
“I can’t produce saliva, I’ve ...
I held my breath waiting for him to cancel again. This was our second time around as a couple.
That first time we met; he was one of only two men that I grab...
I’m sending out a blanket apology to anyone who listened to my advice when I was twenty-five. I’m so sorry, I was an idiot.
My friend Sonia recently reminded me that she got married because of me. I had no recollection of any profound words.
We thought, how many bad marriages could have been avoided if people didn’t listen to our shitty WISDOM?
...
I admit. I saw the red flags.
While on the dating apps, I’ve developed a keen radar for identifying the scams, middle-aged fuckboys, lonely losers, and below...
One Saturday afternoon in January 2018, I was taking a selfie in front of a Robert Indiana LOVE sculpture in a Chelsea gallery when my friend Nancy called.
“...
After four years and 158 days of separation, my attorney’s office sent this anti-climactic and business-like email:
“We received a certified copy of the Judgme...
Ginny Poleman spends her time giving in-person walking tours and webinars about NYC history; leads school tours at the Metropolitan Museum Art; and goes on cool dates in cozy lounges and retro bars. She also works on her young adult novels. Follow her adventures on Instagram @ginnyinprogress, and her tour business @NYC.Encounters.
