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A Steamy and Sexy Start

The two women had booked a room near town and went out to the local bar. It was early June and the summer crowds hadn't hit the town yet to their relief. They took a seat at the bar and were deep in convo. "Hate to interrupt you guys, but what can I get you to drink." Rose turned toward the bar tender and her heart skipped. He was salt and peppered, rugged faced and fit, could have been late 50's early 60's, no definitely in his 60's. "Um, I wasn't going to have a drink before our big trek but now that I'm here, screw that, I'll have a Casamigos and Soda and some wings if you have. What about you Ally?" Rose barely looked at Ally, she just studied the server's face as he focused on Ally's order. She saw his eyes shift back toward her and she looked down and felt a hot flush rush on her neck. He walked away for a bit but Rose had lost her concentration, trying hard to listen as Ally was running through the logistics of tomorrow's adventure. "Ok, guys, here you go. By the way I'm Todd, where are you all in from?" Rose was listening to Todd but mostly feeling him as he spoke. It was freeing to be in a new place, untethered from anyone except the road ahead and she felt a little giddy....

Reasons to Make a Change at 64

“Will you still need me, will you still feed me When I'm 64” I was 8 years old when the Beatles released that song.  Of course, I thought being 64 was ancient.  I pictured 64 year old people as using walkers, wearing hearing aids, sitting in rocking chairs reading newspapers, and watching old movies on television.  People who are 64, I thought back then, were wrinkled, and bent over. How is it that I am now 64? And how is it that I just let a doctor inject chemicals into my face so I would not look like I am 64.  I remember first hearing about Botox and fillers decades ago, and swearing that was not something I would ever succumb to.  I have never been much for makeup and generally prefer a natural look.  But the problem is for the past few years, when I looked in the mirror, I did not recognize the saggy, lined face staring back. ...

Featured on Relationship Thursday

woman alcohol

A Steamy and Sexy Start

The two women had booked a room near town and went out to the local bar. It was early June and the summer crowds hadn't hit the town yet to their relief. They took a seat at the bar and were deep in convo. "Hate to interrupt you guys, but what can I get you to drink." Rose turned toward the bar tender and her heart skipped. He was salt and peppered, rugged faced and fit, could have been late 50's early 60's, no definitely in his 60's. "Um, I wasn't going to have a drink before our big trek but now that I'm here, screw that, I'll have a Casamigos and Soda and some wings if you have. What about you Ally?" Rose barely looked at Ally, she just studied the server's face as he focused on Ally's order. She saw his eyes shift back toward her and she looked down and felt a hot flush rush on her neck. He walked away for a bit but Rose had lost her concentration, trying hard to listen as Ally was running through the logistics of tomorrow's adventure. "Ok, guys, here you go. By the way I'm Todd, where are you all in from?" Rose was listening to Todd but mostly feeling him as he spoke. It was freeing to be in a new place, untethered from anyone except the road ahead and she felt a little giddy....

Cautiously Courageous: Reflections On Life Expanding Decisions

I recently went on a women’s empowerment cruise, invited by my daughter who was one of the featured speakers. Sitting in that audience, I wondered if I were their age today whether everything out-of-the-box would still seem as scary. Then I realized most of these women had a safety net my friends and I didn’t have… us as parents encouraging them to have goals that trumped being safe and secure. We instilled in them the knowledge that although making brave choices generates anxiety, it’s survivable and so worth the risk. My parents’ fears of the uncertain were contagious; hopefully our confidence in our daughters’ resilience is too. ...
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Forging an Adult Relationship with my Daughter

‘She’s such a bitch.’             ‘Everything I say annoys her.’             ‘Nothing I do is right.’             ‘She’s only nice to me when she needs money.’             ‘What happened to my sweet little girl?’ Do these laments sound familiar?  They do to me because at some point since my daughter, Britt, went to college, graduated and  moved to New York City  I have uttered each one. But over the past twelve years I have found myself lamenting less and enjoying her more. Why? Did she change? Or did I? A bit of both but weighted much more heavily on me.  I’m not sure if it was a conscious decision but I think this complaining about my adult daughter diminished when I started to view her for what she is in that order: ADULT then DAUGHTER. Once I changed my perspective to treat her as an adult first, my daughter second, our relationship became much less strained and tenuous. ...

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