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cristiano ranaldoI begin this post with a caveat: The kids might be messing with me.  After all, they know I write this “What I learned from the kids” blog about once a year after I’ve spent some extended time with them–and that would be just their style.

But since I never actually heard them whispering conspiratorially: “let’s mess with mom this year,” (and I am listening even when I am pretending to be doing something else) I’m going to ignore those paranoid thoughts.  If I’m wrong, I will just SMH (hang in there– to be explained), take the hit and chalk it up to a lesson learned.

Hah!  Do you know what SMH means? Read on.  Here’s what I learned from the kids this weekend:

1. Acronyms.  I thought I was pretty up on my acronyms, because a few weeks ago, I learned YOLO (You Only Live Once) and FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) from a girlfriend.  When I mentioned those, they laughed and said, “oh, that’s really great mom,” with a touch of sarcasm.  Then they rattled off about 20 more, and we played “Guess the Acronym” (what else do you do in a hurricane?)

I got many of these– not at first, but in context.  Can you? Take this quiz– answers below.

a. TBH:  As in, “TBH, I think your boyfriend is such a loser.”

b. SMH:  As used in my opening in this post, although I am positive no one in their 20’s has ever used it that way.

c. IMHO:  As in, “IMHO, you look like a bleached out old whore…”  BTW, Mom, that wouldn’t have helped.

d. GTFO:  As an answer to something ridiculous: “last night I partied with the cast of Orange is the New Black.”  Response:  “GTFO.”

e.  TTYT:   As an ending to your text.

2.  If someone says, “Bye, Felicia” (with a bit of an attitude) it means—“Go ahead, leave, I really don’t give a damn.”  It is based on the movie “Friday” which none of us have probably seen, so we don’t really understand this at all.  But if I say “Goodbye Felicia” to my partner here at BA50, whose name is Felice, I just may be saying goodbye to her forever, because she starts twitching when someone calls her that.  But there is always that danger because half the time we don’t get my friends’ names exactly right. I’m lucky to even come close.

3. Soccer is here to stay. I know this with 100% certainty.  My adult children and their friends (most of the computer nerd and jazz musician variety) are just about the most unlikely sports enthusiasts around.  My daughter has responded to an offer of seeing the Red Sox play from front row seats at Fenway Park by saying, “really, dad, if it’s an option, I’d much rather you sell the tickets and take me shopping…” (FYI, that was not an option…)  But those same kids were glued to the TV for both World Cup games this past weekend.

I surmise this is mostly because soccer players are totally hot (and not hidden behind pads and helmets).  I was introduced this weekend to Cristiano Ronaldo, whose picture I couldn’t help but use as my feature (it got you to click through, right?), and to this commercial, which I embedded in this post to assure a few “likes”.

4. “Normcore”:  it’s not the opposite of “hardcore,” because that would be “softcore.”  And it’s not really in between either.  I actually couldn’t get a great definition, but it seems to refer to the fashion trend of wearing nondescript, very average looking clothes.  For example, Hipsters in Brooklyn might dress “normcore” ironically by wearing $45 New Balance sneakers (the monochromatic kind) and a nondescript (non-graphic) T-shirt.

And then there’s the example my daughter gave: “normcore is the way dad dresses.” Ouch.

5. A Few New Things to Watch on TV: “Broad City” (this is a fabulous new comedy on Comedy Central- we watched 4 episodes and loved it, BBC’s “Human Planet” (as opposed to “Planet Earth”), “BBC Africa”—which is not out yet (and I am assuming you can not get it before it is released, like they did).

Apparently, if you give them the food these special kids love… craft beers, unlimited Kombucha (with and without chia seeds), home-made gazpacho, plantain chips, French lentil salad (thank you, Ina), edamame pods, fresh baguettes and some wasabi almonds, and they’ll talk your ears off.

But if I find they were messing with me, it’s Diet Coke and Doritos next year. In any case, TTYNW (I made that up, but I know you can figure it out.)

(Quiz Answer key: a. TBH=To be honest; b. SMH=Shake my head; c. IMHO=in my humble opinion; d. GTFO=Get the f&*k out; e. TTYT=Talk to you to tomorrow.)

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