Those of you who have followed my blogs for awhile now know of my love/hate relationship with Gwyneth Paltrow. I subscribe to her blog and devour it when a new post appears. I refer to It’s All Good on almost a daily basis for food and lifestyle inspiration. I love her movie roles (yes, even Shallow Hal,) her sense of style, the daring fashion adventures, even the glowing skin and shiny hair have my secret admiration, despite knowing that thousands of dollars has been spent at the salon to achieve same.
She seems so attainable, in a movie star kind of way – projecting the message “I’m just like you…” even though she’s a movie star who pals around with Madonna and is married to a rock star – and that’s exactly where the hate part of my relationship with Gwyneth Paltrow starts.
There is something about the “I’m just like you only better than you” aura that makes me want to punch all that exquisitely styled and beautifully coiffed loveliness in the face. How can you take seriously someone who publishes with a straight face: Hungover? No problem! Just get yourself to a Turkish hammam for a day of steam and sauna. Follow up with some pharmaceutical-grade vitamin powders, and eat a couple Umeboshi Plums (that’s a thing, apparently). Easy peasy!
So when I received her tactfully crafted email via Goop that she and hunky husband Chris Martin were “consciously uncoupling” (which apparently is the new new politically correct term for dumping a relationship) I had to suppress my gag reflex. I was secretly smug and delighted that the doyenne of all things perfect and unattainable was about to enter the world of all things that pretty much suck. In case you have been living in a cave or your internet has been out, this is the official announcement:
“It is with hearts full of sadness that we have decided to separate. We have been working hard for well over a year, some of it together, some of it separated, to see what might have been possible between us, and we have come to the conclusion that while we love each other very much we will remain separate. We are, however, and always will be a family, and in many ways we are closer than we have ever been. We are parents first and foremost, to two incredibly wonderful children and we ask for their and our space and privacy to be respected at this difficult time. We have always conducted our relationship privately, and we hope that as we consciously uncouple and co-parent, we will be able to continue in the same manner.”
Where I have to give props to Gwynnie is the part where is writes “…We are, however, and always will be a family, and in many ways we are closer than we have ever been…and we hope that as we consciously uncouple and co-parent, we will be able to continue in the same manner.” I realized while reading her statement for the umpteenth time that the same statement holds true for my ex-husband and me. Despite a divorce and separate residences and relationships we are still a family. We have family dinners and family meetings and family text messages. While we are uncoupled as a Couple, in some ways we are closer than we were when we were legally One. The co-parenting component as an un-couple has forced us to dig a bit deeper into our emotional wells and find (better?) solutions to situations that may have been too easily dismissed with a delegation of the responsibility or a credit card. I truly believe that both of us have better relationships with our children now than we did when we were married.
So maybe GP & CM are on to something. Of course they will both get dragged through the tabloids, and there will be accusations and condemnations on both parts. The media loves a circus and who better to knock off her high horse than the woman who says “I am who I am. I can’t pretend to be somebody who makes $25,000 a year.”
But I’ll say this much: if anyone can consciously uncouple and emerge unscathed, with her dewey skin and perfectly sculpted body in tact, it’s Gwyneth…