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elderly female woman with shorter graying hair wearing a purple jacket and blue shirt frowns and gives the camera or imaginary person a disapproving look while she shakes her finger and appears to be scolding someone“Get out there and do this!”  

“Do that!”

“Reinvent yourself!”

“Make your dream come true!”

“Contribute to the world!”

There are a lot of voices out there exhorting women to use their midlife and after time to DO SOMETHING! Telling them they are OBLIGATED to do it. That they’re not enough without CONTRIBUTING!

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I hear them. You do, too.  But I have to admit, they rub me the wrong way.

Let me present a different view:

Maybe you’ve already done it.

That’s right. Maybe you have already contributed in a big way.  Or a small way.

Maybe you supported a family with a long work history. Or maybe you had a career you loved.

Perhaps you raised a family and enjoyed watching them grow into happy and accomplished adults.

Maybe it’s time to rest on your laurels.

All this exhorting to make something of ourselves later in life? To reinvent ourselves?

Just NO.

You are absolutely enough. You don’t have to do anything further, unless you want to. Are called to.

If you want to spend the rest of your life playing with your grandkids, taking them on trips, learning how to weave baskets or just napping all day–it’s perfectly ok. You’re entitled.

You do not have to monetize your true loves if you don’t want to. You’ve earned the down time.

Whenever I hear a “should” or an “you’re obligated to” my hackles go up.  And oh-by-the-way, this is a uniquely female thing. You don’t hear men being hounded to do something. When they’re done, well, they’re done.

Here’s something to think about:

By the time you get to midlife, you’ve already done so much.

So be easy with yourself.

Do what you want to do, even if it’s sitting on the porch every day with a book.

It’s enough.

You are enough.

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Don’t Let Anyone Tell You That You Are Not Enough was last modified: by