To Go Brazilian Or Not?

brazilian wax waxing Have you ever seen what a Brazilian looks like?  Do you know anyone who has one?  If you know anyone under the age of 30, then I imagine you do.  Because if my friend is right, “no one” under the age of 30 has hair down there anymore.
A “Brazilian” is the complete removal, by waxing, of all hair down below.  As my Bubbie might say (if she were inclined to discuss such things) it is hair removal from “pupick” to “tuchas.”  And from what I’m hearing, Brazilians are becoming very popular with women over 50.  Maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not.  They don’t seem to publish a lot of statistics about this, but for some reason, there seems to be a lot of talk about it lately.
I am weirded-out, grossed-out, and totally intrigued all at the same time.  Talk about spring cleaning!  Talk about cleaning out your personal house for Passover!
Whether or not to go full frontal came up the other night over dinner at Girls Night Out.
“You really should write about Brazilians,” my friend suggested, “women our age want to know what it’s like.”
For about a nanosecond I thought she wanted me to write about the people, the culture, or perhaps even the deforestation of the Amazon.  “Brazilians?” I exclaimed, “I love Brazilians! My sister-in-law is from Itambacuri!”

“Brazilian waxes,” she informed me.  She looked me straight in the eyes and said shyly, “My husband loves it and it makes me feel very sexy.  I love it too.”

Another friend told me she does Brazilian waxes regularly–not for her partner, but for herself–because it made her feel wonderful and clean. As I cringed, she described how a very talented Israeli woman ripped the hair off her most personal areas with melted wax–in a matter of minutes–for only $65.00.  “She gets everywhere, she even has you finish off the process with your heels over your head.”

Now that was an image I tried to banish from my head.  But, I guess if you’re gonna do it, you might as well go all the way.

“Doesn’t it hurt like hell?” I asked.  I was assured that, yes, indeed it is uncomfortable.  Discomfort, in my experience, is a euphemism for extreme pain, like when a doctor tells you that you may be “uncomfortable” for a few minutes, and then proceeds to stick a needle slowly up your spine and twist it around a bit.  But according to my friend, if you have ever run a marathon or suffered from severe mental anguish–the Brazilian is a piece of cake.  And that was supposed to be comforting.

I know women want to feel younger, but …. Lolita young?  And at what cost?  I started wondering what was under all those towels at the gym.  Had she?  Hadn’t she?  Would I?  I have never been so happy to see a few women unabashedly displaying their pubic hair (even if they were in their 70s)!

I am about as daring as they come, but daring enough to go Brazilian?

This was my very first thought: I have a husband that never notices when I get my hair cut. What if I went to all that pain and trouble…and he didn’t notice?  I’d have to kill him.

What if it grew back totally gray?  What if it was itchy and I ended up scratching my crotch like a professional baseball player?  What if it aged like an old tattoo?  Do I really need yet ANOTHER expensive maintenance treatment? Would I have to start wearing thongs?

But maybe it would feel sexy and wonderful and clean. Maybe my husband would love it.  And maybe, just maybe, it would help keep me cool during hot flashes!

And then I thought about going to my gynecologist appointment next week.  I’ve been going to the same doctor for a decade.  Even if she didn’t say anything, I know she’d be smirking to herself and thinking, “What the hell?”  And because she is under 40, I’d start wondering about her…and I don’t want to go there.  So I would have to change gynecologists, wouldn’t I?  Or am I just flattering myself that she would remember my vagina from the hundreds she sees each year?  In any case, I don’t think I’d be willing to take the risk, and it’s bad enough having to change hair stylists.

So the question remains:  Could I–Would I– Should I?  Do you?  What do you think?  If you are a 50-something out there who is dating, do you feel a little pressure to go bare?  Is this a fad that should be confined to the under-30 crowd, or is it a bold (and bald) beautiful move for women 50 and over?


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To Go Brazilian Or Not? was last modified: by

Ronna Benjamin

Ronna Benjamin

After 28 years of practicing real estate law, Ronna Benjamin realized how much she loved writing and how much she hated lawyering. She jumped into the world of writing at Better After 50 and never looked back! She is loving her “second act” as Partner and Managing Editor at Better After 50. Ronna writes humorously about the things BA50s are concerned about – personal experiences with adult children, the quirks of aging parents and in-laws, and her own emotional and physical health issues (i.e., insomnia, anxiety, and bulging waist lines). A native Bostonian who loves to spend time with her husband and three adult children, Ronna also enjoys sailing, cooking, running, and biking–and she tolerates skiing so she is not left home during family vacations. Check out her new book “We Are Better After 50 Because…” co-written by Ronna and her BA50 Partner Felice Shapiro, a perfect gift for the birthday girl in her 50’s! 

  35 comments for “To Go Brazilian Or Not?

  1. Diane Lutz
    March 26, 2013 at 6:56 am

    I leaves you more sensitive. Enough said.

  2. Deb
    March 26, 2013 at 7:37 am

    Of course! And yes, maintenance is a pain – one more thing to squeeze in on a Saturday, but if sex after 50 is better (and we know it is) what could be wrong with a little exposure?

    • Ronna Benjamin
      March 26, 2013 at 11:11 am

      And another thought: it solves the problem of the draperies not matching the rug, right? HAHA

      • Erica Ferencik
        March 26, 2013 at 12:52 pm


      • lisa
        March 31, 2013 at 11:55 am

        while it does make me more sensitive, and hubby loves it, it absolutely does not go with cycling. causes ingrown hairs. nuf said.

        • Roz
          July 4, 2015 at 3:16 pm

          Try “Tend Hair”

  3. MaryF
    March 26, 2013 at 7:44 am

    Great article…i had no idea and now you have me wondering…

  4. March 26, 2013 at 9:59 am

    So…DID you?

    Thanks for the laugh!

    • Ronna Benjamin
      March 26, 2013 at 11:09 am

      I can’t give my most precious secrets away. All I can tell you is that if I did, I will not be writing about it!

  5. Erica Ferencik
    March 26, 2013 at 12:54 pm

    Unless I decide to do porn for a living (UNLIKELY) I’m going to stay hairy ‘n cozy. But it’s fun to hear the stories…:)

    • Glenn
      June 1, 2015 at 4:01 am

      Thank you for excersizing your intentions to maintain your natural character in the processes of intimate congress! I find it so endearing to find a real woman, who doesn’t feel the need to retract to the sub-popular opinion of using infantcy as a sexual application in the arena of sexual arousal and fantasy. Kudos to you!

  6. March 26, 2013 at 12:57 pm

    I shaved for a b-f once. NEVER again. Totally insane itching when it grew back in. I will trim, fine, but grown women are not supposed to be bald as Barbie dolls, IMO.

    And I have plenty of sensation, thank you.

  7. March 26, 2013 at 1:44 pm

    Hey ladies – if it makes you feel sexier about yourself and give you a confidence boost as you go through menopause, why not?!

  8. Cathy Chester
    March 26, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    In a few years I don’t think I’ll find a need to go Brazilian. Nature is doing it for me. Lovely…

    I remember the first time I even thought twice about public hair. A movie “These Old Broads” with Liz Taylor and Debbie Reynolds (they made up) chatting about age, and Liz declared no one ever told her she’d be getting gray pubies. I thought – what the hell – what else didn’t they tell us?

    Great post, Ronna. I think I’m hanging out with the wrong friends. We NEVER talk about this juicy stuff…

  9. March 26, 2013 at 2:25 pm

    lol, it would take care of the grey … but what if it all came back – grey?
    And the itch, would I look as tho I had been making out with many men who retire to FL and pass around unseemly ‘bugs’?
    Too much to consider … and the feet over my shoulders would probably put me in traction anyway.

  10. March 26, 2013 at 2:47 pm

    And from what I hear, men under a certain age are doing “man-scaping” too. Who knew?!

  11. March 26, 2013 at 6:01 pm

    Thanks, but no thanks. Me and my sweetie are happy with my fur coat.

  12. March 26, 2013 at 8:27 pm

    Sounds too painful. And when did we decide Mother Nature made us ugly THERE as well as everywhere else? My husband said he likes that I don’t look like an 8-year old.

    • March 29, 2013 at 10:18 am

      LOL!!! What?! You didn’t marry a pedophile? That’s funny.

  13. Judy
    March 27, 2013 at 11:18 am

    Wow. So glad you posted this as I have been wondering about this topic and women our age. I just don’t know. I guess everyone needs to feel sexy in their own way. I just hate the thought of another maintenance routine.

  14. Diane Lutz
    March 27, 2013 at 4:24 pm

    If you still have dark hair up against light skin you can do the laser treatment which is permanent. No itching, no maintenance, but can be costly. I think it’s at least worth doing the bikini line so you bever have to shave there again.

  15. sue
    March 27, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    I cannot be the ONLY one who is flabbergasted at this trend…if I understand it, women are volunteering to spend time, money, and energy getting pubic hair ripped out regularly- to “feel sexy”? WTF? I do indeed make time for things that sometimes leave me sore (mini triathlons) and cost money (new head hairdo, great sexy tops etc-)….but the exercise yields endorphins (and a greater capacity for ice cream), and the hair/clothes give me a sense of powerful maturity.

    Jeez..maybe the above makes me sound like a “hairy-armpit – libber”..oh well. But come on…do we really think that a 20 year old girl needs this? I say- almost as much as she needs fake boobs.

  16. Lynne Kivimaki
    March 28, 2013 at 10:53 pm

    The only way I would ever consider it is if my husband agreed to do it with me. Why is it it’s OK for guys to stay natural but not women? That said, manscaping is a good thing and much appreciated. Neither one of us needs to go back to pre puberty to be turned on. Hats off to those of you who have the guts to do it though! I’ve heard it hurts like childbirth and I did that with the help of an epidural!

  17. March 31, 2013 at 10:27 am

    I accidentally had a near-Brazilian when the non-English speaking woman went a little too far. It was fun later–painful as hell in the moment.

    I like a well-trimmed look, it makes me feel sexier for some reason. But, I know there are medical practitioners who warn against it.

  18. April 14, 2013 at 11:52 am

    I was thinking about having a Brazilian wax done but after reading about the maintenance…I think I’ll pass. For now.

  19. Terry
    December 31, 2013 at 6:08 pm

    Would I consider having the hair ripped off my labia and mons? Um, no. Not even once. I think it’s crazy weird sexually to intentionally make oneself look like a child and I’d be vaguely disgusted by any guy who wanted it. I’m not interested in volunteering for pain, especially if I have to (repeatedly) pay for it, and I’ve read multiple articles by gynecologists recommending against it for health reasons (such as the destruction of sebaceous glands in the genital area). Luckily, my husband shares my opinion, so we both remain happily (hotly) hairy.


    Lovin’ my Lady Garden

  20. Michelle
    February 4, 2015 at 3:53 pm

    I went one step further….I got laser hair removal. 6 treatments and I am “Brazilian” for life. After my divorce, a guy I got me a thong bikini to wear on a beach vacations. It was so tiny in front, I had to remove everything. I waxed for about a year until I determined that I never wanted hair down there again. The man I was seeing (now my husband) paid for me to get laser removal since he hated “hair down there”. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. Now I can wear tiny thongs and G’s with no worries, and hubby loves it. FYI….He got it done also, so we are both “smoothies” as my one friend calls it.

    • Jeff
      March 5, 2015 at 9:34 am

      I have always hated hair down there and been shaving since I was 13. Now that I’m 48, two years ago when I heard that guys were starting to have barzilian’s and just had to get the guts to go in and have it done. I did have it done and it was one of the best choices that I had made for myself. I even had meet my wife and she also had been shave for years before we meet. I had asked her about if I had went and had laser treatments if she would mind, and she said to go ahead and that if it worked out for me that she would do it fir herself, so she did so we are both also smoothies.

  21. olivia
    September 17, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    I have been waxed for several years now and i’m 50+. Sometimes I have a “landing strip” left (a smallish patch right over the lips), sometimes not. I like the landing strip because otherwise it feels too sensitive to wear pants… lol But i can say without a doubt that it feels cleaner and stays *fresher* during the course of a day. Also makes for relative ease with receiving oral pleasure. Virtually hands-free, which leaves hands free for other things. 🙂

  22. January 8, 2016 at 5:45 pm

    ‘I would have to kill him!’ lol

  23. Moe
    March 19, 2016 at 1:55 pm

    I do not believe some of you women. I’m a 68 year old man and have been shaving or waxing for the last 32 years, thanks to my exwife. In that short time period I have been with a large number of women ranging from 26 – 74 years old and only three didn’t at least trim, most have had their hair completely removed one way or the other. It has nothing to do with looking like a child, most people feel cleaner, more sensitive and it is cooler (temperature wise). Some of you may like a mouth full of hair but there are a lot of people that prefer not having to deal with it. As for you with the quick judgments about why others do it or like it, I have to wonder where you minds are at.

    • GoodTxGirl
      June 10, 2016 at 3:16 pm

      YAY MOE! I like your thinking! I am 53 and about to do it for the first time…I tried shaving but the ingrown hairs are miserable. With waxing if you use the creams then no problem!

  24. Mikey
    July 16, 2016 at 11:03 am

    My wife “surprised” me when she came home with a full brazillian. She is dark and somewhat full haired naturally so oral sex was a bit of work for me, even when she trimmed.she was also very self concious over her appearance among other things. Since the braziliian she is less self concious, the oral is fun and spontaneois.Now im getting myself waxed. Best bump to our sex life since the last kid moved out.

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